Pressured Parents Stressed out Kids or Exercises for Arthritis

Pressured Parents, Stressed-Out Kids: Dealing with Competition While Raising a Successful Child

Author: Wendy S Grolnick

It begins harmlessly. Parents casually chatting on the playground or over dinner compare their babies' first milestones: "Has Erin started talking? Danielle's already using five-word sentences!" Inevitably, Erin's mom and dad feel anxious. Later, as report cards, standardized tests, tryouts, playoffs, auditions, admission interviews, and social cliques fill their child's world, parents' anxiety intensifies. The older children get, the more competition they face, whether in sports, academics or the arts. Hovering in the background, inciting everyone, is the race for admission to a top-tier college.
To help panicky parents deal with the torrential emotions stirred up by our competitive society, and to give them scientific knowledge about their children's growing years, leading child researcher Wendy Grolnick and educational and parenting journalist Kathy Seal offer this illuminating and accessible guide to channeling competitive anxiety into positive parenting. While evolution has given parents a genetic predisposition toward this protective anxiety whenever their children face today's heightened competition, the authors guide parents to avoid pushing and pressuring, turning their fear instead into calm guidance.
Distilling the results of thirty years of research in child psychology, the authors focus on three essential feelings-autonomy, competence, and connectedness-which parents can foster in their children to maximize the child's chances of success and minimize family conflict. They explain that granting kids autonomy lets them feel that they can solve their own problems and are responsible for their own actions. At the same time, providing structure gives kids theguidelines, information, limits, and consequences that they need to act in the world, instilling them with a feeling of competence. Finally, support from adults in the form of time and other resources provides children with a necessary feeling of connection and helps them internalize the ideas and values of their caring parents.
Reassuring and empathic, Grolnick and Seal show parents how to avoid the burn-out-in both parents and children-that afflicts so many in our highly competitive society, while raising children who thrive and excel.

Publishers Weekly

Parents today suffer from what Grolnick and Seal call "Pressured Parent Phenomenon," constant anxiety over whether our children are as competitive as they could be. Both Grolnick, a professor of psychology at Clark University, and Seal, coauthor of Motivated Minds, are parents themselves, so they speak from both their own experiences and from research. Experiments have confirmed that competitive pressure actually dampens a child's motivation. But the authors say parents are biologically hardwired to pressure children because we know "that the more competent our children are, the more likely they will pass on our genes." Plus, we have huge "ego-involvement" in our kids' progress. Parents need to convert their anxiety into "positive parenting" and encourage a child's "intrinsic motivation." Parents should focus on developing children's autonomy, their confidence in their own abilities. This doesn't mean letting them do whatever they want; in fact, parents need to stay involved and connected with what the child is doing. Parents must also provide the structure a child needs to exercise competence, and Grolnick and Seal provide plenty of tips on better ways to handle those inevitable times when competitive anxiety threatens a parent's better judgment. (Jan.)

Copyright 2007 Reed Business Information

Table of Contents:

Authors' Note     7
Wendy's Preface     9
Kathy's Preface     17
Wendy's Acknowledgments     21
Kathy's Acknowledgments     23
Parent Panic: It Takes You by Surprise     25
Why Now? "Our Kids Are Competing All the Time"     41
It's an Animal Thing: When Our Hardwiring Goes Haywire     71
The Big Takeover: How Our Feelings Pull Us to Push     91
Beyond the Carrot and the Stick: Fanning the Flames of Your Child's Inner Passion     107
R[subscript x] for Intrinsic Motivation: Encouraging Your Child's Autonomy     129
The How-to of Autonomy     149
Stand by Me: Maximizing Your Involvement     175
"What Do You Expect?" Channeling Anxiety into Rules, Guidelines, and Information     203
Calming Down: "That All Sounds Very Nice, But How Can I Use These Techniques When I'm Feeling So Anxious?"     219
Endnotes     245
Bibliography     265
Index     275

Book review: Building a Bridge to the Eighteenth Century or Special Providence

Exercises for Arthritis: 100 Exercises for Healthy Living

Author: Erin ODriscoll

According to the Centers for Disease Control an estimated 70 million people are affected by one of the more than 100 types of arthritis.

Arthritis is the leading cause of disability in America and as the population ages, more and more people are being struck by some form of this crippling disease. No matter what form of arthritis you have, doctors and medical experts agree, exercise can help you lead a happier, more productive and pain-free life.

The medical and fitness experts from The Healthy Living Institute have compiled 100 simple exercises designed to help arthritis sufferers build muscle, strengthen ligaments and maintain flexibility while fighting fatigue and pain.

Exercises for Arthritis includes:
•Targeted exercises for the neck and back, hands and arms, hips, knees, and feet.
•The importance of aerobic exercise and special relaxation and sleep techniques.
•Water exercises, tips for maintaining motivation, workout plans for all levels of fitness and much more.

If you or someone you know suffers from arthritis, you need this book. Exercises for Arthritis will help you alleviate pain, maintain your independence, and improve your quality of life.